


Be gay, do crime

by MotherRameses



Series: Crazy, Ridiculous, Sugar-Fueled, Self-Induced 30 Min Prompt Challenge [5]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Ever seen that clip of those two chip thieves who stop an armed robbery?, F/F, because the prompt was "be gay and do crimes", but in a sex shop, this is that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-11
Updated: 2019-07-11
Packaged: 2020-06-26 07:21:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19763302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MotherRameses/pseuds/MotherRameses
Summary: Sabine and Ketsu go to a sex shop and have an adventure.A prompt for a 30 minute writing challenge "Sabine and Ketsu - be gay, do crime".





	Be gay, do crime

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JessKo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JessKo/gifts).



> Thanks to JessKo for the prompt! It was a blast to write. 
> 
> Link to the vid, if anyone wants to see the original that inspired this. It's hilarious. 
> 
> https://youtu.be/NvnGRQySprE

“This is such a bad idea,” Sabine grumbled, trailing behind Ketsu as they walked into the seedy looking shop. They were in a decidedly  _ bad _ neighborhood on Corellia, and had Ketsu not been so insistent that their next chance to pick up their desired merchandise wouldn't be until after they finished their upcoming job, Sabine wouldn’t have agreed to it at all.

Though she did have to admit, she was looking forward to getting what they came for.

“What, you’ve never been in a sex shop before?” Ketsu muttered back before grinning and waiving cheerfully to the shop owner, who scowled at them as they walked through the door.

Sabine hadn’t, but didn’t want to admit it to her partner.

She wrinkled her nose as she followed Ketsu through the close-set aisles, wondering what the hell that smell was. Something acidic and fruity and musty at the same time. The lighting was bad, and the shadows of the shop’s corners seemed foreboding. Ketsu didn’t seem to mind though, strolling through the aisles and peering at the merchandise with interest while Sabine took up the rear, glancing furtively around. Usually, she trusted her gut, and something about the seedy shop set her on edge.

“Oooh!” Ketsu breathed, and Sabine turned to find her eyeing quite possibly the most ridiculous strap-on she had ever seen.

It was a multi-colored, almost threatening looking tentacle, with matching rainbow straps coiled in its clamshell packaging. It sat above them on a high shelf, out of both of their reaches. They would have to ask the proprietor for a step stool to get it down.

“We’re getting that one,” Ketsu said, turning to her with a wide grin.

“It’s way out of our price range,” Sabine replied, eyeing the sticker below it critically.

“So?” Ketsu asked mildly. “I’ll distract the owner. You climb up and snag it.”

“There are cameras!” Sabine hissed, nodding over her shoulder.

“And?” Ketsu scoffed. “It’s not like we’re ever coming back here, and CorSec won’t care about a little shoplifting in a shit hole like this.”

“I dunno,” Sabine said, but Ketsu had already turned from her, and was sauntering over to the counter. Sabine peered around the corner of the aisle, watching as Ketsu gestured to the clerk, pointing at some sort of lube behind the counter. The clerk turned to grab it, and Ketsu kept gesturing, distracting the owner and keeping them busy.

Sabine sighed, then turned back to the strap-on, and quietly began scaling the shelving. It threatened to totter under her weight, but she was a skilled delinquent, after all, and soon she had snagged it down and was beginning to tuck it into her bag when it all went to hell.

“Get outta here! This is a robbery!” A gruff voice shouted, and Sabine peered around the corner to find a gruff figure storm in, pointing a blaster at the clerk. Ketsu bounded away from him, shooting down an opposite aisle, eyes wide as the man brandished the weapon at the shop owner. The man didn’t notice Ketsu as she slipped around the back of the aisle to Sabine, and the two crouched down together as they listened to him threaten the shopkeeper.

“Kriff kriff kriff what do we do?” Sabine exclaimed.

“I don’t think--” Ketsu cut herself off, flinching as the bandit rapped the counter with the blaster and the shopkeeper whimpered. They could hear the sound of the register being opened, but the thief kept screaming, enraged at the shopkeepers slow pace.

“How are we gonna get out?” Ketsu asked, eyes wide. All of her confident swagger seemed to have disappeared.

“We can’t just leave them,” Sabine said, thinking fast. The thief was likely hopped up on spice or something worse, and would probably continue their reign of terror throughout the night. And if they ran into the thief later, he might recognize Ketsu and decide she knew too much.

Ketsu was about to snarl in disagreement, but Sabine spoke over her. “Go back around the other side,” she said, speaking low and swiftly. “I’ll distract him, and you tackle him when he turns.”

“And after that?” Ketsu cried, flinching again as the thief screamed at the owner.

“I’ll think of something. Trust me!”

Ketsu rolled her eyes, but did as Sabine instructed, creeping back around the aisle to the other side. 

Sabine glanced around quickly and chose her weapon - a giant, purple dildo, sitting on display right by her. She picked it up, ignoring the odd way it sagged and flexed in her hand, and inched her way to the front of the aisle.

“Hurry it up, I ain’t got all day!” The thief snarled, and Sabine could see the terrified eyes of the shopkeeper as they stuffed their credits into a sack held by the thief. 

Taking a deep breath, Sabine stood, then hurled the dildo at the thief, striking him square in the head.

“Hey!” The man snarled, turning around, but Sabine had already sprinted back down the aisle. She heard a loud “oof!” as Ketsu tackled him, and Sabine rounded the corner of the next aisle, sprinting forward again and grabbing a display of cock-rings on the end cap.

“Move, Ketsu!” She cried, heaving with all her might, and sending the display toppling down onto the thief as Ketsu tumbled out of the way.

“Let’s go!” Sabine said, stopping to grab her bag with the illicit strap-on as Ketsu grabbed the man’s blaster and tossed it to the stunned clerk behind the counter.

“Have a good night!” Ketsu cried, laughing so hard tears streamed down her cheeks as they sprinted out of the shop. Sabine looked over her shoulder to see the clerk vault over the counter and train the blaster on the thief, who was trying in vain to clamber out from under the mountain of cock-rings and shelving.

As they slowed their pace down the dingy street, a pair of CorSec enforcement droids wheeled past them, and Sabine realized the clerk had likely triggered a silent alarm when the thief came in.

“Well, that was fun,” Ketsu said once the droids had passed. “Did you get it?”

Sabine grinned and hoisted her bag higher on her shoulder. “Sure did,” she said. “Though if those droids check the cams, they’ll see we took it.”

Ketsu laughed. “I have a feeling the shop owner isn’t gonna press any charges.”

“Me too.” Sabine grinned at Ketsu, and pulled her in for a kiss. “Shall we head to the ship to inspect the fruits of our crime?”

Ketsu chuckled, a wild gleam in her eyes. “Absolutely.”


End file.
